Sunday, September 26, 2010

Microfiction Monday: Lost at Sea?

Welcome to Microfiction Monday, at Stony River: a writing life, where a picture paints 140 characters, or even fewer.[Hate counting letters and spaces? Try Design 215's character counter, which will count for you as you type. Microsoft Word will count for you too, of course, as part of its word count feature under the 'Review' tab.] Here's this week's picture, and my story to go with it.



All night, the storm raged. Now, in the gray-calm morning, none of the boats were Hal's. And Helen's heart fought between fear and hope. (136 characters)

37 comments:

  1. Let's hope Hal returns to Helen. Wonderful Microfiction Michael. Well done.

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  2. Then a sail appeared on the horizon. Her heart was filled with joy!Helen could recognize her Hal's boat from at least 50 miles away! (133 characters)

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  3. Ahhhh! Hang in there Helen!!! :O)

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  4. Bill, Let's hope so.

    karen a., wow, a microfiction to follow a microfiction. Impressive.

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  5. I like your litle story. Just getting the hang of microfition. I guess you have to count the spaces inbetween words as a character?

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  6. Diane, she looks like she's in for the longhaul.

    Book Bird Dog, I believe the spaces "count." Thanks for commenting.

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  7. I vote for hope to win over fear. :)

    Nicely done!

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  8. hope, you've got it! (karen a. ended the story nicely in a hopeful vein.)

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  9. Michael, I hope you don't mind that my microfiction has three less characters than your's does.

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  10. Fear and hope.....difficult competing emotions to deal with. Very well written.

    Mine is up.

    PG

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  11. Oh the mighty widow's walk!

    pretty darn good one there Michael

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  12. karen a., I'm all over "shorter is sweeter."

    Prayer Girl, thanks for the comment. I look forward to visitng yours.

    Suz, I wonder if it was in fact a widow's walk. Looking forward to visiting yours anon.

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  13. Terrific one, Michael, as always! Does sound like a widow's walk to me! Have a great week!

    Sylvia

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  14. Excellent story! My stomach almost bottomed out when I read this. I hope Hal made it home safely.

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  15. This must happen so often throughout the world. Very sad. A clever MM.

    Have a great week x

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  16. An anguished time. Excellently done.

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  17. A nicely written little story, I liked it very much.

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  18. Ooh, I hope he's okay, very good one.

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  19. Wow - that's an emotional punch for so few characters!

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  20. Always go for the hope, right? Well done!

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  21. Hope and fear are such discordant tensions - a high and a low jostling for control! Lovely micro!

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  22. Your description of the emotions battling within her was fantastic in so few words. This was very well written.

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  23. Poor Helen..HOPE is so crucial in all our lives.
    Well done!

    Mine is up

    Have you a Blessed Week!
    hugs
    shakira

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  24. a very critical stage. hope Helen overcomes it :)
    well penned

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  25. Thanks to all of the above for your kind comments. Sylvia K and Shakira: nice to see you both again. I look forward to visitng everyone's MMs during the day. [But first I have to do some work :( ]

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  26. OOh very romantic and evocative. :O)

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  27. Oh, this is heartbreaking! Great microfiction!

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  28. Ever the fear, ever the hope My 140 Hope your week goes well

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  29. It does pull on the heart strings. Well done.

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  30. You and Quilly are very clever! You are the only 2 who noted that there was something else beyond the syrupy micro "Still". The clues are "locked" and "a still"...something frozen in time...like a still from a movie...There's the sadness...She dreams of a moment that progresses nowhere...Something happened on the honeymoon!

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  31. Thanks, Greyscale. It's the first time I've been called clever today. Warms the cockles of me heart, it does.

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  32. Oh no--I can only hope that Hal's ship finally does appear on the horizon...Fingers crossed.
    Have a great week. Cheers!

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  33. Man--I would love to write more micro fiction. i find it much harder to write short.
    hang in there Hal!

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  34. Great comments, all. Thanks!

    Dawn, I'm a novelist myself, but am finding microfiction to be a blast. The search for the right word is paramount in such a short space. (And the MM community is absolutely brilliant, also!)

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  35. I love the phrase about the heart fighting between fear and hope. Well done.

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  36. Very nice. Missing someone is more than just their absence.

    Dave
    Dave Wrote This

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  37. Aw, Helen -- hang in there and keep hoping!

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